Wordsligner • Dissident • Webwright

The Watchmen: A review in bullet points

Published 08 March 2009

I took my fiancée to see Watchmen last night. We were unprepared. I give it ★★★★ out of five. Below sums up my thoughts.

  • It’s violent enough that I cringed. The movie is “patently too adult for … children 17 and under” and the fact that it’s not rated NC-17 is evidence of a moronic and/or corrupt MPAA.
  • In all of 163 minutes, the only part of the whole flick I didn’t believe was a human able to walk in the open air of Antarctica in a peacoat and face sock.
  • It had the finest, most tightly-controlled art direction I’ve seen in a film since Amelie.
  • Multiply how great the art and story were, divide one by the result, and you get an approximation of crapitude of the music.
  • It shows in excellent detail why powers like those of the motherfucking Flash are so dangerous.

In the previews: Terminator will be dumb. Star Trek looks like the story they wanted to tell all along and never had the technology. I’d want to see X-Men Origins: Wolverine even if Gambit wasn’t in it.